There is an often misunderstood quote regarding SAHM's (stay at home moms) which refers to the lack of adult conversation. I speak with adults PLENTY. All day even. It's the topics that are lacking. Moms are so consumed with parenting, that's the only thing talked about. Here are some examples:
Exhibit A
Last Spring a mother of a deaf child in Nicki's class was complaining to me about how hard it was to get her insurance company to realize her daughter needed special things, a new hearing aid, special therapies. My response: "Think what you will about her, but Hilary would certainly take care of those kind of issues if she wins." This was met with a blank stare which wordlessly stated "Hillary who?" I shouldn't be surprised, when my husband and I got our simply put "Obama" bumper stickers women at the playground asked what it stood for.
Exhibit B
This was a CLASSIC at LaJolla Shores recently. A fellow mom yelled at a surfer with a skim board that almost ran into our kids. Mind you, we were definitely IN the surf zone of the beach, play at your peril. He pretty much told her as much, to which she informed me "I should sue his A*$, he's just lucky I didn't go freakin' MOM on his
A@*" to which I felt obliged to then go Bill Mahr (known child foil) on hers, but refrained because we were, afterall, at a child's birthday party.
Exhibit C:
A fellow mom friend left me a perky voice mail saying she wanted to catch up! I called her back and was immediately asked "Hey, watchya doing tomorrow night from 5:50- 7:45pm?" Naively, I'm seeing Happy Hour pedicures they give at that bar in LaJolla in my future, and exclaim "Nothing!" to which I'm asked "Great, can you watch my kids? We have passes to a new restaurant opening." This is the mom version of a tactic learned in our twenties:
Caller A: Whatchya doing this weekend?
Caller B: Nothing.
Caller A: Great, can you help me move?
Nervy.
Conversation with four year old Nick in the car:
Nicki: You know what I want? I wish I had a make up table like Sofia. With a mirror and a chair. And you know what I want? I wish I had a sparkly purple lipstick like Jupiter.
Mommy Ginny: That's great Nicki, and I guess when you're young everything seems so magnificent, and grand, and you just want every cool thing you see, don't you?
Nicki: No.(Insert silent rethink here.) Yeah.
Ginny: That's understandable, but I want you to think about something when you see something you want. Think to yourself, "I sure do like Sofia's makeup table, and I sure do like the sound of that lipstick Jupiter said she has, but I do like my own makeup box and lip gloss so I sure am appreciative that I have them." The sooner you learn that lesson Nicki, the HAPPIER you're going to be.
Nicki: I do do that. It's just that I'm even HAPPIER when I see new things to HAVE! Anyway, the more things I ask for, the more I get.
Philosophy of an insatiable only child...
Mommy Ginny sighs.
NICKI'S VIEW ON PRE-K:
"School's great mom, want to know why? Because now you have time to plan surprise birthday parties for me without me getting in your way.
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